Lately i have been rather down. I don't know why. There's a lot i'm dissatisfied with. i feel ashamed to complain outwardly because who wants to listen to your complains?? I hate listening to people complain. So i complained inwardly. I become rude to people close to me whom I feel I'm compromising with. I felt sold out. No more to give. Occasionally i wake up feeling nauseous and reluctant to get out of bed. I wonder what's wrong with me. What happened to my spirit? My dreams. I know I am lost somewhere.
I am the youth of the instant gratification generation. I take things for granted. I wish to be rewarded for my hard work quickly. I lack empathy. The truth is I dream, but i let it go. Caught up in the busy-ness of the days. the wants that i presumed were needs. It makes me feel a little lost. What is life now? Without a dream, without a goal?
Pray to God to let me pull through this phase. I know i will come back to being the cheerful, passionate about life Suz. I just need to sort through some mess. just a little more to wallow and.............complain.